How to manage the dramatic triangle according to your personality type
Communication, often fluid in normal situations, becomes far more complex when tensions, disagreements or conflicts arise. At such times, mastering the art of good communication can make all the difference. Eric Berne’s work on Transactional Analysis contributed to the creation of two powerful tools for better managing these situations: Process Communication Model (PCM) and the Dramatic Triangle (KPM). This paper explores how to combine these two models to help manage tensions and improve our interactions, whether in a professional or personal context.
Process Communication Model (PCM)
Developed by Dr. Taïbi Kahler, the Process Communication Model (PCM) is a powerful tool for communicating and managing interpersonal relationships. This model enables us to better understand ourselves by identifying our deepest motivations and analyzing our behaviors under stress. It is based on the identification of six distinct personality types: Harmonizer, Thinker, Persister, Imaginer, Promoter and Rebel. Each of these personality types has unique characteristics in terms of communication, psychological needs and ways of perceiving the world. For example, the Harmonizer personnality type will be particularly sensitive to emotions and human relationships, while the Thinker personality type will favor logic and concrete facts. Initially designed for NASA to improve astronaut selection and training, PCM has since been adopted in a variety of sectors for its practical applications and effectiveness. In the corporate world, PCM can make a significant contribution to team cohesion and performance. By understanding the other person’s personality, it becomes possible to adapt one’s communication to meet the other’s specific needs, which can considerably improve interactions and collaboration. For example, a manager who understands that his or her employee has a Persister personality type will be able to adapt his or her communication style to value that employee’s opinions and convictions, thereby reinforcing motivation and commitment. Similarly, in a conflict resolution context, PCM offers valuable tools for identifying sources of tension and adopting communication strategies adapted to each personality type. PCM is a comprehensive and flexible model for creating more harmonious and productive work environments, with the emphasis on mutual understanding and adaptability.
| Personality type | What I talk about | How I talk about it |
| Harmonizer | Emotions, feelings, sentiments | With my heart |
| Thinker | Information, dates, figures, rational, factual | Asks questions, exchanges information |
| Persister | Opinions, commitment, respect, principles | Asks questions, exchange points of view |
| Imaginer | Reflections, thoughts, projections, vision | Thoughtful, introspective, asks questions |
| Promoter | Actions, challenge, competition | Directing style, fast, assertive |
| Rebel | Reactions, spontaneity, playfulness, fun, cool | With enthusiasm, excitement, casual |
PCM: Personality types and how they communicate
The Dramatic Triangle (KPM)
Created by Dr. Stephen Karpman, the Dramatic Triangle, also known as the KPM, is a psychological model that describes the dysfunctional relationship dynamics that often emerge in conflict situations. The model identifies three main roles: Persecutor, Rescuer and Victim. Each of these roles is characterized by specific behaviors and attitudes which, although often negative, can also be transformed into positive interactions. The Persecutor, for example, is often perceived as aggressive or critical, but can adopt a constructive attitude by embodying Authority, offering benevolent advice and setting clear limits. The Rescuer, on the other hand, may be perceived as intrusive or overprotective, but can demonstrate Empathy by supporting others respectfully and helping them to develop their autonomy. Finally, the Victim, often seen as powerless or passive, can express genuine Sincerity by acknowledging their responsibilities and seeking proactive solutions to their problems. The Dramatic Triangle is a valuable tool for understanding and resolving interpersonal conflicts. By identifying the roles individuals adopt in an interaction, it becomes possible to recognize negative dynamics and transform them into healthier, more constructive interactions. For example, in a professional context, a manager who recognizes that he or she is adopting the role of Persecutor may choose to modify his or her behavior to become a benevolent authority figure, which can improve communication and collaboration within the team. Similarly, a colleague who realizes that he or she is playing the role of Savior may learn to offer help in a more respectful way, encouraging autonomy and responsibility among colleagues. The Dramatic Triangle offers an enlightening perspective on relationship dynamics, and provides strategies for transforming negative interactions into positive, productive exchanges.
Karpman Dramatic triangle
Combining the two models
By combining PCM and KPM, we can detect the weak signals that precede tension, such as a vexatious gesture, an innuendo or a derogatory remark. This combination also enables us to tailor our response to each situation. Depending on our personality type and the role our interlocutor is playing, our reactions to avoid or get out of the Triangle will be more effective and more natural.
Reacting to the role of Persecutor
When a person adopts the role of Persecutor, he or she is in a position of superiority and can criticize or attack. Here’s how each personality type might respond constructively (P+), with authority and in line with their natural temperament:
- Harmonizer: Propose an open and benevolent solution, without direct confrontation.
- Thinker: Take a factual, well-argued Position to counterbalance the aggression.
- Persister: Lay down clear Principles, emphasizing mutual respect.
- Imaginer: Suggest a Project or a future solution, allowing you to focus on positive actions.
- Promoter: Assert your Power calmly, while remaining true to yourself.
- Rebel: Break with convention and offer creative permission to lighten the situation.
Reacting to the Rescuer role
People in the Rescuer role often try to help others without being asked, which can stifle or unbalance relationships. Here’s how you can respond with empathy, in line with your natural temperament (S+):
- Harmonizer: Show Solicitude and understand the Savior’s intention.
- Thinker: Propose a concrete Solution to the problem raised.
- Persister: Value Solidarity while setting limits.
- Imaginer: Offer a discreet and useful service.
- Promoter: Propose a pragmatic and direct Solution.
- Rebel: Use Sympathy and playfulness to defuse intrusive help.
Reacting to the role of Victim
The person in the role of Victim places themselves in a position of weakness, often seeking the pity or help of others. Here’s how each personality type could react positively, with sincerity and in line with their natural temperament (V+):
- Harmonizer: Expressing one’s own Vulnerability to create an authentic connection.
- Thinker: Showing Will and rationality to provide pragmatic help.
- Persister: Show Valor and Commitment to encourage responsibility.
- Imaginer: Express a Wish, a positive vision to get out of a state of victimization.
- Promoter: Use Vitality to encourage action and control.
- Rebel: Project a positive, optimistic Vision to motivate others to move forward.
| K by K 🙂 | Harmonizer | Thinker | Persister | Imaginer | Promoter | Rebel |
| P+ | Proposition | Position | Principle | Project | Power | Permissions |
| S+ | Sollicitude | Solution | Solidarity | Service | Solution | Sympathy |
| V+ | Vulnerability | Willingness | Valor | Wish | Vitality | Vision+ |
Kahler and Karpman summary table
Practical applications
Let’s try to illustrate this with a professional example: Conflict management in the workplace.
Context: A manager (Persecutor) openly criticizes a member of his team (Thinker) during a meeting, accusing him of not meeting deadlines.
Without applying the models: The team member could feel attacked, become defensive or even avoid confrontation, creating a tense long-term relationship.
With PCM and KPM: The team member, identifying the Persecutor role played by the manager, might choose to respond with the Position (P+ response) specific to his or her Thinker type. This could take the form of a factual, calm, well-argued response: “We’ve had a delay due to the revision of the specifications. Here’s the plan we’ve put in place to meet future deadlines”.
=> Result: By avoiding an emotional reaction, the employee maintains mutual respect and helps redirect the conversation towards solutions rather than blame.
Let’s look at a personal example: A friendly relationship.
Context: A friend (Rescuer) constantly offers unsolicited advice to another friend (Harmonizer), who feels suffocated but doesn’t dare say so for fear of hurting the other’s feelings.
Without applying the models: The friend receiving the help could end up feeling overwhelmed and frustrated, which could lead to a break-up or emotional confrontation.
With PCM and KPM: The empathetic friend may recognize that her interlocutor is playing the role of Rescuer. She would choose to respond with Solicitude (S+ response). For example, she might say, “I know you want to help me and I appreciate it, but I need to try to handle this situation on my own to learn and grow.”
=> Result: By using a caring and empathetic approach, the friend avoids conflict while preserving the relationship.
Conclusion
The art of communication is essential in our day-to-day interactions, especially at moments of tension. The Process Communication Model and the Dramatic Triangle are invaluable tools for better understanding our own behavior and that of others. By combining these two approaches, we can not only avoid falling into destructive psychological games, but also strengthen our relationships by responding appropriately to difficult behavior. These tools are only a help, but their application enables us to live together better, improving the quality of our personal and professional interactions.
